Tuesday, May 05, 2009


Atop Kyle's dresser are two pots of gorgeous blooming orchids. After much internal struggle, I have finally learned to appreciate and enjoy the exotic flowers. The reason behind not liking the flowers had to do with their source. A person from Kyle's past asked him to hold on to them for a while, since she was in transition. Each time he tried to get her to take them back, she had some excuse why she couldn't do it, prolonging their presence in his room, and increasing my irritation by being reminded of her each time I saw them. I wondered if that had been her goal? Regardless of any hidden agenda or not, seeing them in his room bothered me. More and more buds opened up and I could logically see that they were stunning, but I felt like to enjoy them would be to affirm their place in Kyle's room, which seemed the same as accepting her presence there, too. I didn't feel that was right. Occasionally, when I stopped by Kyle's place, the lighting would be just right and I would catch myself smiling when I saw the fucsia petals and delicate green stem against the backdrop of a snow-lined aspen tree outside the window. It really was pretty and I realized I had been silly to allow personal feelings about a human being keep me from enjoying the simple beauty of a flower. Especially in the middle of a long winter when nothing but pine trees grow outside for months, the vibrant colors of the orchids were a splash of life and hope and a preview of the spring to come. I decided then and there to change my attitude and attempt to disconnect the flowers from the person who put them there. It has worked. A while back, the second pot of orchids began to bloom. When the first bud opened, it wasn't the same bright purple color of the other plant, but a creamy off white with brilliant dark pink stripes. Gorgeous. She has since stated that she doesn't want the plants back at all; Kyle should keep them. So be it. I now see them with a different outlook. Under our care, the flowers are growing, blooming, and thriving, a lot like our relationship.

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